Yes, we know, we know, remakes can sometimes be the laziest, most cash-hungry films that ever exist, and more often than not, we'd be inclined to agree with you. However, there have been some examples of great, sometimes better than the original remakes (The Thing, Invasion Of The Body Snatchers), but what the remakers – not a real word - seem to forget is that there are plenty of average, or even straight up bad movies that had some real potential. So the following is a mix of ten films that, whether they were great first time round or not, we'd like to see someone take a crack of them again today.
BREWSTER'S MILLIONS (1985)
Original: Director Walter Hill (48 Hrs., The Warriors, Red Heat) starring Richard Pryor and John Candy. The story of a man who must spend $30 million dollars in 30 days in order to get the rest of his $300 million inheritance, but he can't tell anyone about the deal, and he cannot have anything of monetary worth to show for it at the end of the month.
Remake: Directors Seth Rogen and Evan Goldberg (This Is The End) starring Craig Robinson and Jonah Hill. Basically boost everything up, since everything costs more now than it did in the 80's. $100 million in 10 days to get $1 billion (actually, maybe call it Brewster's Billions), plus it'd finally put the long deserving Robinson front and centre.
DEATH BECOMES HER
Original: Director Robert Zemekis (Back To The Future, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?) starring Meryl Streep, Goldie Hawn and Bruce Willis. Two best frenemies take a potion which allows them to live forever, whatever the consequences, and there's poor schmuck in love with them both, stuck between them.
Remake: Edgar Wright (Shaun Of The Dead, Scott Pilgrim VS The World) starring Sharon Stone, Julianne Moore and Matthew McConaughey. Wright has the right mix of comedy and special effects smarts, plus it'd be nice for him to make a female-centric movie for once. Set the remake even deeper into today's world of show-business, and this could be caustically funny. Oh, and Monica Bellucci in the Isabella Rossellini part, because NOM!
HARRY POTTER & THE PHILOSPHER'S STONE / HARRY POTTER & THE CHAMBER OF SECRETS
Original(s): Director Christopher Columbus (Home Alone, Mrs. Doubtfire) starring, well, you know who was in these movies. This is a bit of a cheat, as its two separate films, but they just stand out like a sore thumb when compared to the more mature tone that came with The Prisoner Of Azkaban and all the subsequent movies in the series. Far too twee.
Remake(s): We imagine it won't be long before this series does get rebooted, but next time make sure they give the first two movies to a director who isn't afraid to scare the kids a little bit. In a dream world, we'd say Guillermo Del Toro, but for now, we'll say his protégé Troy Nixey (Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark).
LAST ACTION HERO
Original: Director John McTiernan (Die Hard, Predator) starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Charles Dance and Austin O'Brien. A young action fan finds a magical ticket, which transports him into the world of his favorite action star. This was meta-filmmaking before Charlie Kauffman made it cool, but was kinda messed up by the studio who wanted a straight-ahead action film and got something they didn't quite understand.
Remake: Director Shane Black (Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, Iron Man 3), who actually wrote the original script to the original movie, starring Will Smith. We'd like to see Big Willie properly send up his own image, and finally embrace some of the darker projects he's managed to avoid so far.
THE MONEY PIT
Original: Richard Benjamin (My Stepmother Is An Alien, Made In America) starring Tom Hanks and Shelley Long. A young couple buy a new home for them to live in, not realising just how desperately dilapidated the building is. Chaos ensues.
Remake: Judd Apatow (The 40 Year Old Virgin, Knocked Up) starring Donald Glover and Emma Stone. We'd like to see Apatow be genuinely funny again – seriously, Funny People and This Is 40 made NOBODY laugh – but he'd still be able to make topical jokes if he wanted to, about the inflated house pricing market or whatever. Just make sure that Glover and Stone fall down, over and into things. A lot.
NORTH BY NORTHWEST
Original: Alfred Hitchcock (Psycho, Vertigo) starring Cary Grant, Eva Marie Saint and James Mason. A simple case of mistaken identity, but for this advertising executive who gets taken for an international spy, it could also end with his death! Dun dun duuuun! Hitchcock has had Psycho, Dial M For Murder, Rear Window and more remade, so why not this one?
Remake: Director Ben Affleck (Argo, The Town) directs himself, Catherine Zeta Jones and Christopher Walken. As far as we can see, he'd have two ways to go about this: (1) set it back in the time when the original was made, so the plot can't be disrupted by a simple Google search, or (2) set it today, but bring in some elements of that awful Sandra Bullock movie The Net – which could also stand to be remade, actually – and have Affleck's character completely set up via internet wrongdoers!
SEE NO EVIL, HEAR NO EVIL
Original: Arthur Hiller (Love Story) starring Gene Wilder, Richard Pryor and Kevin Spacey. A deaf guy and a blind guy get accidentally caught up in a murder plot, which is itself part of a much larger conspiracy.
Remake: Mike Nichols (The Birdcage) and, maybe just to mix it up, starring Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. We'd especially find it hilarious when they start drooling over the hot killer, played by Joan Severance in the original, so maybe … Channing Tatum? Someone like that. Oh, and let Fey and Poehler write the script themselves.
Original: Director Russell Mulcahy (Highlander) starring Alec Baldwin, Penelope Ann Miller and Ian McKellan. A 30's set superhero action film about a man who can "cloud the minds of his enemies", which comes in handy when one specific enemy is building an atomic bomb right in the middle of New York City.
Remake: Director Michel Gondry (Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind) starring Ryan Gosling, and here's why: Firstly, Gondry may have made a dog's dinner of his last superhero outing with The Green Hornet, but his visionary mind coupled with The Shadow's superpowers could be amazing. Plus, Gosling looks pretty dapper in old-school garb, and we'd like to see him lighten up a little bit more.
Original: Director Christophe Gans (Brotherhood Of The Wolf) directs Radha Mitchell, Sean Bean and Laurie Holden. Based on a video game, a mother goes searching for her daughter in a mysteriously desolate town, which may or may not be a gateway into a hellish parallel dimension.
Remake: Yes, we know it's been less than seven years since the original came out, and there's already been a sequel, but this whole series got off on the wrong foot. Silent Hill should absolutely freak you out in every way imaginable, so get the script written by David Lynch, get the movie directed by David Cronenberg, and get any actress capable of screaming in the lead role. Donezo.
Original: Barry Levinson (Rain Man, Disclosure) directs Dustin Hoffman, Sharon Stone and Samuel L Jackson. A group of scientists are brought to the bottom of the ocean, where a giant, ancient spacecraft has been discovered. On board is a massive golden orb, which begins to effect each of them psychologically, bringing their own worst fears to life.
Remake: Get a director who can successfully mix sci-fi, action and horror - not an easy task, but we reckon Neil Marshall (The Descent, some episodes of Game Of Thrones) could be up to the task - and get a hip, young-but-not-too-young cast involved. The book by Michael Crichton (Jurassic Park) had some pretty head-trippy ideas that the original movie failed to materialize, so that'll be the primary thing to get right this time round.
Any movies you would like to see get the remake treatment? Sound off below!